🧠 3 Ways ADHD & Executive Function Make Holidays Difficult for Kids & Families, AND HOW to help!

Hey, what’s up, compassionate, proactive, caring parents, teachers, therapists, and anyone interested in supporting kids with executive function challenges?

We know the holidays can be crazy, and today I’m going to talk about three ways executive function challenges can make the holidays harder. These challenges can turn what’s supposed to be a time of connection, relaxation, and fun into something chaotic and uncomfortable.

I’m going to walk you through three key areas: planning, organization, and impulsivity. Feel free to pause and take notes as you go.

—

My name is Seth Perler from SethPerler.com, ExecutiveFunctionSummit.com, and the Executive Function Lab. If you find this helpful, feel free to like, share, and leave a comment.

In my work with students, executive function refers to how the brain helps us execute and get important things done. It includes many skills—like planning, organization, and impulse control.

Let’s get started.

—

First, let’s talk about planning and how it impacts holiday stress.

Executive function helps us think ahead—what some people call “future thinking.” It allows us to imagine what’s coming, anticipate challenges, and prepare.

When kids struggle with planning and future thinking, they can feel more stressed because they don’t know what to expect. When things happen, they feel caught off guard.

During the holidays, routines change. There’s more rushing, more events, and less structure. While a break from routine is important, this lack of structure can feel overwhelming.

—

So, what can you do?

Most families have about two weeks off during the holidays. I encourage you to sit down with your child—whether they’re in fourth grade or college—and plan together.

Use a large visual calendar (a desk calendar works great). Turn off electronics if possible and spend 15–30 minutes talking through what the next couple of weeks will look like.

Ask:

* What are we doing?
* What do we need to remember?
* What should we prepare for?

More planning leads to less chaos—and more presence, connection, and enjoyment.

—

Next, let’s talk about organization.

The brain’s executive function system helps us organize our lives. During the holidays, everything already feels busy, but this is actually a great time to prepare for what’s coming next.

I recommend using this time to prep for the upcoming semester or quarter.

Sit down with your child and:

* Review grades and reflect
* Set goals (focus on actions, not just outcomes)
* Reorganize backpacks, desks, and materials
* Get everything ready for a strong start

—

I suggest batching this into a few sessions.

Plan for three sessions, but aim to complete at least two. Life happens—so if you plan for three and complete one or two, that’s still a big win.

For example, you might set aside a few hours on two different days to organize and prepare.

This small investment of time can save a lot of stress later.

—

Finally, let’s talk about impulsivity and emotional regulation.

Executive function helps us regulate our behavior and emotions. When kids struggle with this, they may be more impulsive—blurting things out, reacting quickly, or having difficulty managing emotions.

During the holidays, everything is less predictable. There’s more stimulation, more transitions, and more pressure—which can make regulation even harder.

—

But what do we really want during the holidays?

Connection.

We want to be present, enjoy each other, and create meaningful moments.

However, impulsivity, emotional overwhelm, and distractions (like screens) can interfere with that.

—

So, what can you do?

Take a moment and think about how your family connects best.

What helps everyone feel present, relaxed, and happy?

Maybe it’s:

* Board games
* Movie nights
* Cooking together
* Going outside
* Attending events together

Even if you have teenagers who seem less interested, think about what might still work.

—

Write these ideas down.

Then go back to your planning step and schedule these moments on your calendar.

Make connection intentional.

Plan a movie night. Plan a cooking night. Plan time together.

That’s the goal.

—

Let’s quickly recap:

1. Plan ahead – Sit down with your child and map out the holiday schedule.
2. Get organized – Use this time to prepare for the upcoming semester.
3. Prioritize connection – Be mindful of impulsivity and emotional regulation, and intentionally create time to connect.

—

My name is Seth Perler from SethPerler.com. If you’re not familiar with my work, you can check out my site, grab free resources, and sign up for updates.

What do you think? Do you have ideas for making the holidays more connected, fun, and present—especially for neurodiverse kids?

Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.

—

I wish you joy, peace of mind, and—most importantly—connection with the people you care about, especially the kids in your life.

Have a fantastic day. Take care.