How early parents should look for 2e?

What’s going on? It’s me, Seth from SethPerler.com, executive function coach out of Boulder, Colorado. I help struggling students navigate this thing called education.

I’m coming to you from my couch today because I’m sick. I don’t feel so good, but I wanted to get a vlog out to you. I’m actually going to do two today.

This first one is about 2E kids, and in particular, it’s based on this email:

“Hi Seth,

I recognize that you have so many people to help, and I don’t want to steal your time, so I’ll keep my two questions short.

1. My daughter is 7 and in first grade. What’s a good age to determine that a child is 2E?

2. Why do you recommend a neuropsychologist instead of a clinical psychologist for evaluations?”

All right, question number one:

What is a good age to determine whether your child is 2E?

Here’s what I would recommend to parents: be on the lookout for whether your child is 2E—or whatever your child is—as early as humanly possible.

Read up on things. Learn. Educate yourself.

Read my 2E article and watch the accompanying video. The article includes an extensive PDF with a massive checklist. It’s not the ultimate authority, and I don’t really like boxing kids into categories, but it gives you many things to consider.

Read through the article thoroughly. Watch the video carefully. Read it multiple times. Learn as much as you can about twice-exceptionality, giftedness, and different types of disabilities.

The goal is to find out as early as possible.

Now, here’s my concern.

Some 2E kids are relatively easy to identify. They’ve got a clearly recognizable disability or learning challenge, and they’re obviously gifted in one or more areas. It’s fairly black-and-white.

Those cases don’t concern me as much.

What concerns me are the kids I often see in my practice—the ones I call kids in the gray zone.

Kids in the gray zone are often misunderstood and not seen clearly. When they’re misunderstood, their needs aren’t met. Worse, they’re often shamed by well-intentioned adults.

These adults include teachers, parents, counselors, administrators, support staff, tutors, and others involved in the child’s life.

You’ll often find yourself saying things like:

“This teacher just doesn’t get my kid.”

“They don’t understand what’s really going on.”

“I can’t wait for this school year to be over.”

“Why are they being so rigid with my child?”

Those are the kinds of conversations parents of gray-zone kids frequently have.

There are really two types of gray-zone kids.

The first type is where the child’s gifts overshadow their disabilities.

For example, I often see kids with very advanced verbal abilities. They can have deep, sophisticated conversations with adults that are far beyond what you’d expect for their age. They’re articulate and insightful.

But they also have a disability.

The problem is that adults see the giftedness and assume the child should be able to do everything.

They say:

“I know they’re capable.”

“I’ve seen them do it before.”

“They just aren’t trying hard enough.”

“They aren’t motivated.”

“They need more discipline.”

“They’re choosing not to do it.”

In reality, there may be a disability interfering with their ability to perform.

The second type of gray-zone kid is the opposite.

In this case, the disability overshadows the gifts.

The disability is obvious and highly visible. Everyone focuses on it. Meanwhile, the child’s strengths, talents, and gifts go unnoticed and undeveloped.

Those are the kids I worry about most.

All kids are complicated.

Gifted kids are complicated.

Kids with disabilities are complicated.

But 2E kids are often extraordinarily complicated.

I don’t want you leaving this video thinking that you’ll identify a problem, implement a few interventions, and everything will be fixed.

These are issues you’ll likely be dealing with for years.

That’s okay—that’s life. Human beings are complicated.

But because these situations are complex, we can’t pretend they’re simple.

We can’t assume that a few interventions, some test scores, an IEP, or a 504 plan will magically solve everything.

Reality is much more nuanced.

You have a child who deserves a great future. They need certain skills and knowledge to get there.

The question is:

How do we personalize, customize, tailor, and differentiate their educational experience so it develops their strengths, supports their challenges, and meets their needs?

The answer starts with clarity.

You’re asking exactly the right question.

The earlier we understand who this child is, the sooner parents, teachers, and support staff can work together to meet that child’s needs.

Now, onto question number two:

Why do I recommend a neuropsychologist instead of a clinical psychologist?

You mentioned that you’re trying to schedule an appointment with a neuropsychologist based on my video, but they told you they only work with children who have brain injuries.

Not all neuropsychologists only work with brain injuries.

I don’t know exactly where you live in Arizona. Whether you’re in Phoenix or a smaller town makes a difference.

The reason I often recommend neuropsychologists is that they typically conduct a very broad range of testing. They administer extensive test batteries, often over multiple days, and they really get to know your child.

Does that automatically make them better than a clinical psychologist?

Not necessarily.

What matters most is the relationship and the quality of the evaluation.

If you have a clinical psychologist whom you trust, who understands your child, communicates clearly, and helps answer your questions, that’s what matters.

You could go to the best neuropsychologist on paper and still leave with a $3,000 report, a stack of papers, and no idea what any of it means.

That doesn’t help.

Whoever conducts the evaluation, I want you to walk away with answers—not necessarily all the answers, but meaningful clarity.

You should leave thinking:

“Wow, this opened our eyes.”

“We understand our child much better now.”

“We have direction.”

A clinical psychologist can absolutely provide that.

So don’t underestimate either profession.

Keep researching.

Call several providers—both clinical psychologists and neuropsychologists—and ask this question:

“When I leave your office, will I have answers to my questions, or will I leave with a stack of papers that I don’t understand? How will you help me interpret the results and understand what they mean for my child?”

That’s the key.

I don’t care who conducts the evaluation.

What matters is that you get answers.

With that, my name is Seth from SethPerler.com.

If you haven’t already, subscribe to my website. There’s lots of great information for helping complicated kids.

Subscribe on YouTube, give this video a thumbs-up, leave a comment, and do whatever you can to help spread these ideas to more families so we can serve more kids.

Hopefully, I won’t be sick much longer.

I hope you’re doing well.

Take care.