Seriously, you’re not.
I don’t know if there’s something in the air or what, but I’ve had so many students, parents and teachers tell me stories lately about broken schools, I have to share it.
Know this: if something feels wrong, it probably is. There are a lot of people going through the same thing. So often we feel alone, wondering if we’re off base, if we worry too much. Too many students struggle and suffer needlessly, and you’re not crazy, even though systemic dysfunction would have you believe so.
The proverbial elephant in the room
Consider this…
Teachers often share with me that they don’t have a voice
They’re afraid of backlash for speaking their truth in the best interest of students. They tell me about getting glares, being shunned, “causing trouble” when trying to do the right thing. They may risk non-renewal or firing.
Parents often share with me that they don’t have a voice
They fear that if they speak up, their child will suffer somehow.
Many parents have gotten the run-around so many times they’re ready to explode.
A parent recently told me that the school was requiring their high schooler to take the ACT test– that the entire school “had” to take it. She wrote to the admin, “Since my son can barely complete 50% of the ACT exam, and with low accuracy, and is not getting needed accommodations, we would prefer for him to opt out of the 4/23 exam. Please confirm: We want to ensure there is No Penalty against our son for opting out of the April 23rd exam. The practice test had 75 questions. In the time provided, he got 34 correct responses.” After a few cryptic replies, she finally had to go in person to get a clear “no, he will not be penalized.”
Schools can’t force kids to take tests, but they certainly don’t tell you about your rights to opt-out either. In fact, a lot of people get angry at the thought of kids opting out, driven by a scarcity mindset and fear that funding will get cut. Either way, listen to your gut, keep advocating until your child’s needs are properly met.
You’re not alone
One parent wrote me about her situation, “He is quite behind and very disorganized and discouraged. He has a list of missing assignments. Some are missing, some not finished or finished and just not turned in. He is very discouraged with school, doesn’t seem to care. Feels he can’t improve his grade. Doesn’t want to make up missed assignments because he feels he is still going to flunk. I don’t know what to do. We all know he is smart, except him.” I hear a similar story with different words all the time. You’re not alone. Keep pushing forward.
Nonsense policies or rules
A parent recently wrote me about a situation they were dealing with, “This isRIDICULOUS! Why are they concerned about things that are so trivial???? I am thinking about finding a different school. I feel very guilty for putting my son in a situation where he feels sad, stressed, angry and “stupid.”” Too many people are wasting time with trite issues.
Rigidity
A lot of the families I work with deal with teachers who are so rigid that you wonder why they became teachers. Some simply don’t have the inner tools needed to properly serve students. Unfortunately, school leadership doesn’t always support teachers to develop their craft much beyond mandatory “staff development” and ineffective accountability procedures. If you feel like someone doesn’t get your kid, you’re probably right.
IEP, 504
Ever sit through an IEP or 504 meeting baffled by lip service and how challenging it is to help a student in need? 10 people crammed in a small room for 30 minutes to discuss the complex needs of an outside-the-box learner doesn’t cut it. Not to mention, parents often tell me they don’t feel like anyone even reads/honors these documents.
Just waiting for this school year to be over
I am deeply disturbed every time I hear a parent discuss this. We live in a country that provides free education to its citizens. We are really screwing it up when kids are suffering so much that families are just waiting for it to be over! And the upcoming year is a crapshoot. What an unnecessary disservice! School can and should be fun, engaging, and rewarding for all learners.
Shit show
When I asked one of my teacher friends how her year was going, she said, “this year’s been a shit show.” Bigger classes, less planning time, more paperwork, less autonomy, more time working from home, cut arts, less support, another new curriculum, no raise again, etc.. Teachers tell me similar stories all the time. Our kids deserve teachers who are taken care of. Period.
Hero
It’s hard for a system to question patterns or long held beliefs. If you’re trying to change things to ensure that students are getting what they need to write their own scripts in life, and you run up against barriers that baffle you, you’re not crazy. Standing up for the rights of kids to experience great education is the work of the humble hero. You are sane and students need you (I’m speaking to parents, educators, therapists, and anyone else interested in kids). Your voice matters, your willingness to stand up for effective education matters. It’s literally heroic.
We are the stewards of a wild new world and taming it can be exhausting and discouraging. Don’t give in. We are leaving this world to the children we love, the stakes are high. It’s a time of unprecedented change, which is terrifying and thrilling at the same time. There are tremendous problems we are leaving our children to deal with and massive hope, but education is key. People everywhere are stepping up and making a huge difference. It is imperative, vital, critical that we give our kids the type of education they need to solve the problems they are growing up with.
You matter. You absolutely, definitely, positively, matter. You are Joseph Campbell’s hero, on a transformative journey, digging deep, slaying dragons. Everything you do to make things better, matters, so keep it up. Keep raising the vibration and empowering our kids.
Thank YOU for being a part of the solution. Shine on.
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Detail oriented and structured. Linear, sequential, step by step, left brained, focused, organized, good listeners, strong students, on top of things, responsible, concrete, practical, regulated, likes rules, facts, safe, on time, follows directions, knows the right answer, good with systems, uses planners, puts things back, good with folders and binders, turns in homework, studies.
Not good with details. Global, big picture, holistic thinkers. Right brained, random, distracted, disorganized, abstract, creative, daydreamy, emotional, intuitive, sensitive, artistic, questions rules, struggles with structure, not good with deadlines, vivid imagination, visual, risk takers, good with figurative language and metaphor, free, idea people, forgets homework, colors outside the lines, can’t fit inside the box.
Of course these are generalizations exemplifying the extremes. Of course there is a lot of grey area and overlapping. Of course we all use both sides of our brains.
There are kids on both ends of the spectrum and everywhere in between. Neither is better or worse, just different.
But there is immense value in understanding that the vast majority of struggling students fit into category 2, and that there is a legitimate difference in how these students think, precess and learn. The strengths, talents and gifts of these students often go unnoticed and neglected, their strengths are difficult to “grade”. And it’s unfortunate because they are often deeply misunderstood, shamed and judged as lazy or uncaring. Sadly, our educational system is geared towards left brained learners, who tend to be perceived as “successful” while right brained learners can often appear “unsuccessful”.
We need to take tremendous care in how we work with all learners so they can all shine bright. The time is now.
Great teachers don’t teach school, they teach people.
They don’t “control” their classes, they lead individuals to thrive.
They don’t get kids “caught up,” they meet learners where they’re at and inspire curiosity… Without judgement or shame.
They don’t depend on “data to drive instruction,” they inspire people to fall in love with learning.
They aren’t concerned with “accountability” because they’re entrenched in authentically caring that students feel like worthy and capable human beings.
They don’t “teach to the test,” nor do they teach “curriculum” or “standards.”They literally teach people to be authors, artists, mathematicians, athletes, scientists, historians.
Great teachers are artists, empowering people to craft lives which make the most of their unalienable rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
It’s July 5th, 2013 and I’m heading to the World Domination Summit in Portland, OR. This conference has had a tremendous influence on how I’ve built my blog. It has been life-changing to be surrounded by the energy of a bunch of people trying to dominate the world with good work.
WDS is a group of 3000 amazing people who do good for the world in various capacities (with a tech twist). Last year I met and saw some incredible speakers:
Chris Guillebeau – is the ring leader of WDS, a man who writes and speaks about “how to live a remarkable life in a conventional world.” This is what we want education to empower our children to do.
Brene Brown – looks at how shame and vulnerability affect our lives. She has many important insights which also apply to our children!
Jonathan Fields – created The Good Life Project, a collection of in-dept interviews of amazing people who contribute to the world powerfully.
Scott Harrison – is a truly inspirational man who turned his life of selfishenss into a life of immense service to humanity through CharityWater.
Cal Newport – has important perspectives on what it means to live our passions.
What really strikes me about the WDSers is that they are people who are trying to live their dreams. Ultimately this is what real education should empower us to do. It’s my vision that schools will someday teach kids to really write their own scripts in life so they can have the phenomenal lives they deserve.
In service and gratitude,
Seth
Kids go to school, conform to the system, learn what they need in order to be “happy & successful”, have a great experience, live happily ever after.
If that doesn’t work…
Plan B
Get interventions to help the student conform to a broken system that doesn’t serve them properly. More tutors, therapists, extra busywork, more testing, special programs, punishments, threats, lectures, etc.. Hopefully they won’t learn to resent school. Hopefully they won’t end up feeling bad about themselves.
If that doesn’t work…
Plan C
Back up. Back waaaay up! Take a good look at what kids really need to live well and give well. Seriously, what do you think they really need?
Question everything. What is education for anyhow? Is the homework legitimately valuable? What works? What outside-the-box alternatives may help? What valuable learning is taking place? What, if anything, are grades telling me? Is the educational approach truly addressing how kids learn best??? Oh, and try asking the student what he/she needs, because you might be surprised at how insightful these ideas are when you really listen.
See students as highly unique individuals with complex needs, not as points on a bell curve. Accomodate for these needs. Make learning meaningful, interesting and fun. Inspire and encourage creativity. Teach cooperation. Empower metacognition. Guide social and emotional intelligence. Develop passions, interests, strengths. Teach people how to think and learn, not regurgitate.
Change how we serve the learner. Teach for happiness first.
Hmm… Maybe Plan C should become Plan A.
I was recently working with a high school sophomore. Noting her strengths, I gave her a genuine compliment about her intelligence and ability to come up with uniquely creative solutions and viewpoints. She looked at me and said, “but I’m not smart. I get bad grades.”
My eyes burst wide and I said emphatically, “what do grades have to do with anything? You’re not your grades and you are very smart.”
It’s a crime when kids feel this way. Grades are tiny, blurry snapshots, not big pictures. They’re ‘fools gold,’ and of very little, if any, value. Grades are exceedingly misleading. They don’t tell how much has been learned, what has been learned, what value has come out of a class. Although it may appear so, grades rarely even reflect growth. Students can get straight A’s with minimal learning or challenge. They can work their tails off and get D’s. Grades show how well a student complies with the demands of a teacher. Do we want to raise good little robots?
Criminal is not too harsh a word either. Schools have 180 days a year to serve learners, to give them real tools for life. Kids that don’t fit into boxes often suffer needlessly and it’s not okay. It’s a crime. The words we choose to use with students, the actions we model, the messages we send, these have deep and lasting impacts that shape entire lives. It’s our responsibility to lead learners to understand how they are “smart” and it’s criminal to do otherwise. These are people’s lives we are messing with. Too often adults justify their actions by thinking they’re teaching a kid a lesson for his own good. How far off the mark we can be.
Lead well. Demand extraordinary education. Our kids deserve it. And help kids understand how they are smart.
Your thoughts? Do you know a story about a student who feels like he/she isn’t smart? What are some solutions?
By Seth Perler: A parent of one of my former students forwarded this video to me today.
The student in this video is my kind of kid. As Jeff Bliss of Duncanville High is getting kicked out of class, he beautifully articulates what too many kids go through. In the video he’s talking to his teacher, expressing his frustration about how they’re being taught.
He says to his teacher that kids need to learn “face to face”, that “if you want kids to get excited you gotta make em’ excited.”
“You want a kid to change and start doing better you gotta touch his freakin’ heart. Can’t expect a kid to change if all you do is just tell ‘em.”
“You gotta take this job seriously, this is the future of this Nation. And when you come in here, like you did last time and make a statement about: “Oh this is my pay-check.” Indeed it is. But this is my countries future and my education.”
“Since I got here, I’ve done nothing but read packets, so don’t try to take credibility for teaching me jack.”
He’s right.
WATCH THE VIDEO:
The Problem with Packets
“Packets” refer to a groups of worksheets or other copies, stapled together and passed out for classwork or homework. I’ve had to bite my tongue plenty while working with teams of dedicated teachers who still insisted on overusing packets. And now, I coach many students who “hate” packets. Unfortunately, by the middle school level, students often associate this disdain with school, teachers and subject matter. It’s sad. While packets aren’t inherently “bad” there are some common problems with the way many teachers use them:
They’re usually the same for all students regardless of diverse learning needs
They often feel like boring, meaningless busywork
They’re rarely engaging
They can teach kids to resent school
They’re impersonal
They don’t “teach”
In my experience, most teachers who stay in the profession more than a couple years are very well-intentioned, caring, dedicated, hard working people. So why do so many rely on packets?
It’s what they’ve seen modeled in schools for years and few question it. Questioning school protocols and going against the grain is ironically frowned upon for people who are supposed to teach critical thinking.
They are convenient- Easy to manage and grade.
They are often an easy way to “teach to the test.” Many teachers give this sort of busywork for homework so they can better meet school “accountability” goals, not because they find true value for the learners.
Breaking out of this box is uncomfortable for teachers.
It requires unconventional and inconvenient methods of teaching and assessment that give a clearer picture of how a student is learning.
It requires not following the herd.
It requires creativity, time, energy and frankly, teachers are sapped.
It requires support from administrators to be creative, to try new things, to focus less on data and standardization and more on the complex needs of the human beings they are serving.
Alternatives to Packets
Make content engaging. As an educator, it’s my responsibility to make content engaging, fun, interesting, to empower students to find value in the content. It’s also my responsibility to make it into bite sized pieces, and bite sized is different for different students and is largely dependent on executive function-a topic teachers need to master soon. Teaching is a science AND an art. “Differentiating” instruction is one of the artistic aspects that packets don’t address.
Guide students to do engaging, interest based projects. Focus more on developing interests, passions, strengths, talents and curiosities.
Give students as much choice as possible in terms of the content they are learning, the process by which they learn it and the product they use to show their learning. Yes, when properly guided, students are actually capable of making excellent learning choices.
Give students the right amount of structure. Some need more, some less. Yes, this requires more time and effort by our overworked and underpaid teachers (and that’s another story altogether).
Rethink grades completely. What do they really “mean?” How are they used? What alternatives can be used to assess true learning?
Rethink homework. Thoroughly question how valuable a homework assignment truly is. If it’s legitimately valuable to a student, great, if not, what are we doing?
About the Teacher
It’s tempting to blame the teacher, but her inability to teach is really sad. Imagine going to college for 4 years, excited about being a teacher and helping kids. Imagine starting your career without proper support and leadership, being overworked, underpaid, undervalued. Imagine getting burned out, losing family time in exchange for grading papers and planning lessons due to inadequate planning time at work and an overwhelming workload.
It’s easy to blame the teachers, but they are often not given what they need to serve students to the best of their ability. Teachers need to be led by real leaders who help them develop their craft. If a teacher is properly led and still can’t connect with students, sure, get rid of them now. But if they are properly supported and encouraged, most of them can better serve our kids.
What do you think?
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Your gut. Also referred to as the heart, soul, inner voice or intuition. Regardless of what you call it, it’s very different from your mind. It carries a significantly quieter voice from deep within.
The mind is LOUD. It chatters incessantly, always trying to ‘figure things out’. Although it has great ideas, we can’t always rely on them. In fact, the mind often tells stories that don’t serve us at all, but it tells them so loudly that it can drown out the gut feeling.
The gut never lies, and its voice is always present, yet we sometimes ignore it. Whenever we say, “I knew I should have …”, the part of us that “knew” was our gut.
It’s very common
I’ve had countless conversations with parents who want to bounce things off of me to see if they are off base, because of conflicting messages between school and their own gut. It’s always the same routine. They begin by telling me about some rule, opinion, or recommendation from the school. They then tell me that something doesn’t seem quite right. Inevitably, I find myself telling them that their concern is in fact valid and that they should listen to their gut. I then offer up alternatives or different ways of looking at the situation that the school has not noted. Although the limiting beliefs of the system may make it seem like there are few alternatives, the truth is that there are usually many right answers.
The system that needs an update
There are so many factors to consider when thinking about the well being of a child. Schools often have shortsighted solutions, limited resources, expertise and time. Of course teachers are often great with pedagogy, their expertise lies in conveying subject matter. This is one of the great benefits of school. Dedicated teachers work incredibly hard, long hours and deserve enormous respect for their massive investment in our kids. Year after year teachers have more responsibilities, combined with less time and resources. But teachers are human, and their myopic views are perpetuated by outdated systems. These systems are blindly shaped by the intricate consequences of high stakes standardized testing.
But even through this fog, parents do know what’s right and best for their kids and they sense when something is wrong. Parents are the experts regarding their children. Beware though, sometimes the mind tries to mimic the gut and we need to take much more time and stillness to quiet the mind and clarify the whisper of the heart. Nonetheless, ultimately trust your gut. It knows.
Try this:
Practically speaking, if something feels wrong and the school is not responding effectively, here are some places to start:
-Contact the district or university to see if there is a parent advocate or liaison.
-Read your rights. Schools should offer a document outlining the “educational rights of parents” and FAPE
-IDEA – Refer to IDEA http://idea.ed.gov/explore/home
-LRE – understand the intentions of the Least Restrictive Environment http://idea.ed.gov/explore/view/p/%2Croot%2Cstatute%2CI%2CB%2C612%2Ca%2C5%2C
-As schools deal with shocking budget cuts, there are obviously less resources to meet the needs of our kids. Consequently, there are more hoops to jump through in order to get needs met. It’s infuriating to see kids get lost in the mix as parents get the run around, sifting through layers of red tape, baffled at why it’s so difficult to get help for their children. Regardless of these cuts, schools are indeed required provide the services kids need. Press on until you find the right solution. It’s out there, so keep listening to your gut.
Share your thoughts below. How do you listen to your gut through the noise? How have you dealt with similar challenges?
WDS is a group of 3000 amazing people who do good for the world in various capacities (with a tech twist). Last year I met and saw some incredible speakers:
