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Parents, obviously there’s no instruction book for how to help your child. And sometimes children are legitimately difficult to help effectively.
When parents come to me, they’re often at their wits end and at a loss. This video explores this a bit, but my main message here is that you are not alone. Not even a little bit. A larger and larger proportion os students are neurodiverse, outside-the-box, atypical learners and thinkers. More and more kids are not effectively served by cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all, inside-the-box educational approaches that seek “standardization.” Your child is not standard, and they need an education that recognizes their differences, and you are not alone. The bell curve is flattening, there are more and more outliers all the time. We need more individualized, personalized education for all learners.
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Hey families, what’s up? It’s me. Step is to throw it out, Hope you having a great day. I’m coming you today from Cougar Mountain outside Seattle. I just did some socks here and Seattle and I’m going to be headed back to Colorado by later today about for my blog this week. I wanted to mention something very interesting. I had my first meet up with people who follow my blog. So I’ve got about a thousand people on the Block so far and I decided we’ll see what happens. If we do meet up and I had about 10 people come to the meet up at a great little restaurant in Capitol Hill in Seattle. So interesting, but I want I want to explain to you one of the most interesting statement that one of the parents shared that day and what she said was that she said I hear parents who complain and they say I have to tell my kid once or twice to do their stuff and it’s so frustrating and she said that is my dream. I would love to only be able to help that asked him once or twice to do their work, but it is a battle to get them. Do anything and I’m paraphrasing. But basically that’s the gist of this conversation what I really want to leave you with parents is this you are not alone. Not only are you not alone. I have 8000 people on the on my list that there are tens of thousands or hundreds of thousands of families who have neuro a typical students students who don’t fit inside the box now, it’s not just a few not just a couple of kid. It’s not just an outlier here and there the bell curve is getting flat. So the outliers are growing. Okay gender Sam I’m saying parents to You Are Not Alone there are tons of families in there so much shame wrapped around this in so many parents who feel like they’re not doing it right or there’s something wrong with them or they’re going to be shamed by culture Society or schools are other parents or something that they’re not doing it, right and they’re not good. And there’s so much of this sort of Secret of Shame parents. Don’t often share what’s going on and it’s hard to find a place to share it but it is proven by not only this meet up but tons and tons and tons of people who have emailed me and tons of people families that I work with. This is not just some tiny little outlier. There’s an extraordinary big proportion of kids who do not fit inside the box there a typical Earnest are a typical fingers. There are nodes of children and there is nothing wrong with them. They are not broken. They do not need to be fixed. There is nothing wrong with your child. The even the word wrong is wrong. Okay, they start to feel bad about themselves. They feel like they’re broken. Like there’s something wrong with them and they feel shamed and they have all these struggles. Look your child has a unique framed. Okay, they are a typical and there are no adverse that does not mean weird that does not mean strange that does not mean broken that does not remain wrong. I’m so frustrated right now because I see so many kids suffer in school and so many parents suffer feeling like they’re doing something wrong. You did not get an instruction book and its 2018 and we know more about what is kidney than ever but it isn’t main string at okay, so there is nothing wrong with your child. Now the question that you want to be asking is how do we meet their unique means I’m going to say that again. The question we want to be asking is how do we meet the needs of these neurodiverse kids and my answer for you is not rocket. There’s an old saying in special at it, which we came a saying and get the dad and the saying goes like this. Specialized practice best practices best practice for everyone gifted best practices best practice for everyone parents. What does that mean teachers who are watching you guys probably know what this means already, but that’s a mean that basically for gifted and talented students and for special ed students. It’s since they’re more outliers. It’s more clear that they need more individualized instruction or differentiated instruction. You can look up differentiation. The point is is that these kids need education That’s Amore Taylor. It’s less cookie cutter. It’s tailored and personalized to their own unique idiosyncrasies. Okay. Well that is best practice for everyone and I do believe that okay, so we need education that’s going to meet everyone’s needs. Well that requires an extraordinary amount of effort on the behalf of schools and teachers. They need resources than money and time. Yes, they do things need to change. This is not a Small segment of the population where we can do differentiation for just a few kids. This is a getting to be a larger and larger portion of the kids in each class. We need to train teachers in my opinion to be artist and train the much better and not have 50% of teachers quitting by year five because they’re so burnout. We need to be really supporting them to support our kids. Anyhow, I just wanted to leave you with those thoughts today, you know, it’s the beginning of the year and your parents are starting to see the dip happen already. I’m hearing it in emails and kids are struggling and I have parents asked me how do we articulate these IEPs and 504s? How do we Advocate if we don’t have that and I I just I hear the same stories all the time and that’s because the same problems have not changed and we need to change this the parents you are not broken. You do not need to be fixed. Do you need to be educated and learn about the stuff? Yes, but is there something wrong with you know, you did not get an instruction book, okay. In the system that has not changed nearly enough people are doing great things in education there a lot of innovators in a lot of amazing teachers a lot of amazing people out there, but the system as a whole has not changed and it doesn’t want to change they have no no need to hide their there are people who are profiting off of text books curriculum technology there people that are making store in and testing companies, of course extraordinary billions and billions of dollars. They don’t want to change the stuff. So and it’s not going to change until parents and teachers are so clear on the topic that they can be so outraged that they can say no. I’m not the only parent I know. I’m not the only one coming to you with this issue. I need help. You need to start my child. Let’s do this and there needs to be sort of a united front of all these people. So now I want you to Imagine This About one and five kids has some nerve very there. They’re strung out. Why are there no divorce or a typical 20% go look at on the playground one in every five. How many families is that? A lot of families have more than one kids? So it’s a lot of families. Probably I don’t know 30 or 40% of families. And students who are not no more diverse who are more typical parents don’t want them to grow up to be average anyway or typical they want their needs met in Foster. They want them to shine and be pushed also. So anyhow, there’s nothing wrong with you. There’s nothing wrong with your kid. That doesn’t mean don’t do anything about obviously you wouldn’t be watching this video because people will follow me are desperately trying to find solution, but I want you to walk away from this video thing. Okay, we’re not crazy. We’re not broken. There’s nothing wrong with us. There are plenty of people in the same boat that we are how do we connect with other like-minded families? How do we get the stuff out from and hiding and get away from the shame of it? How do we start to change those things? How do we get our teachers to support that they need so they can support our kids. And so that you guys can hopefully leave this video just asking those questions and feeling like me as a parent. I’m doing the best I know how to do. I’m really trying not going to kill myself. I’m not going to see myself. I’m going to be proud of him showing up. I’m going to go try to connect with other people going to tell Mike get the most important thing in the most important thing you can ever ever ever do for your kid in my Is to have quality time with them is to build the relationship with them. They might have all these struggles. They might fail classes. They might this that and the other, but if you have a great relationship with your child, if you built a healthy secure attachment with your child does not have to be perfect if you’re working in that direction. You guys are creating the relationship and that’s where the primary focus is the least in the back of your head. You’re always work on the relationship that my friends is what you will need when they get older and they have real problems in life. You want them to be able to come to you because you have a great relationship with them and want to communicate with you and want help from you and want connection with you. That is number one in my opinion. I hope you have a great day against the stuff the stuff broward.com. If you like this, please thumbs up at share with somebody that you care about and subscribe if you have not subscribed yet. Have a great day.