How to bring up grades in a crunch

Hey everybody, this is Seth from SethPerler.com.

This is a video for both parents and students. If you’re a middle school student, high school student, college student, or a parent trying to help your child—whether they’re in elementary school or college—this video is designed to help you upgrade your grades at the end of a semester.

It’s coming toward the end of the semester. In this particular case, it’s April, and for a lot of students, things start to fall apart around this time.

Then suddenly May arrives, school is almost out, and students find themselves with a bunch of D’s and F’s. They’re looking at summer school, repeating classes in the fall, or dealing with other academic consequences.

Basically, you don’t want to be getting those grades right now.

So let me talk about a few things.

First of all, I’m going to explain specifically how to upgrade your grades. I also have a gift for you—a downloadable worksheet that you can use however you want. I’ll talk more about that in a minute because it’s a key part of what I’m sharing today.

Before we begin, I want to say something important.

Even though I’m going to tell you how to improve your grades, I don’t actually believe letter grades are a valid measure of learning.

I don’t believe in letter grades.

I think they’re morally wrong.

I think they’re archaic.

I think they’re outdated.

They’re often treated as a necessary evil. Technically, I don’t even think they’re necessary—I just think they’re evil.

But honestly, whether I agree with them or not, grades exist.

You do have to function in a school system that uses them.

You want to learn how to earn A’s, B’s, and C’s, pass your classes, and ultimately learn as much as you can.

That’s what education should really be about.

I just wanted to preface everything by saying that I don’t personally believe grades are the best measure of learning.

If you’ve followed my work for a while, you already know that.

However, grades exist, so today we’re going to deal with reality—the reality of a world that uses grades.

Students, don’t get stuck thinking:

“Well, grades are unfair.”

I understand that.

But they exist, and we’re going to work with the system as it currently is.

Ready?

Here we go.

Let’s talk about your typical pattern.

Your MO—your modus operandi—often looks something like this:

The semester starts in January.

Things are going okay.

Your grades are fine.

Then things begin slipping a little bit.

Nobody notices.

You don’t notice.

Your parents don’t notice.

Your teachers don’t notice.

In fact, a lot of students start very strong during the first two or three weeks of a semester.

Then February arrives.

Your grades begin fluctuating.

Things go up and down.

March comes.

Maybe everything plateaus.

April arrives.

Things seem fine.

Then one day you check your grades and suddenly you have two A-pluses and four F’s—or some other wild combination.

For many of my students, their grades are all over the place.

The point is that suddenly you discover some very scary grades, and something has to be done.

What often happens is this:

Everything seems fine.

You’re in denial.

You’re avoiding homework.

You’re avoiding turning things in.

You’re struggling with studying for tests.

You’re having trouble staying organized.

Whatever your specific challenge is, you’re letting things slide.

Then suddenly everything comes crashing down.

You think:

“Oh my gosh. What’s happening?”

Your parents naturally become concerned.

They start asking questions.

They want to figure out what’s going on.

And your response—the student response—is often:

“Don’t worry, Mom.”

“I’ve got this.”

“I’ll talk to the teacher tomorrow.”

“I’ll fix it tomorrow.”

“I’ll turn that in next week.”

“I already have a plan.”

And this cycle repeats itself.

The problem is that it often doesn’t end the way you expect.

Many students are unrealistic about how much time they have left.

They believe they’ll magically pull everything together, but that often doesn’t happen.

That’s the reality.

I’m talking about the real world here.

These are exactly the kinds of students I work with every day.

I help students avoid getting trapped in this pattern.

And when they do get trapped in it, I help them get out.

The first step is being honest about your pattern.

Don’t beat yourself up.

Don’t shame yourself.

Just recognize it.

Say:

“Okay, this is my pattern.”

“I let things slide.”

“I go into denial.”

“I avoid things.”

“Then everything falls apart.”

Once you recognize the pattern, you can recalibrate and move forward.

Now, what I’m about to show you with this worksheet is designed to help you build habits.

It’s not going to make you perfect.

That’s not the goal.

The goal is to build better habits.

If you can develop the habit of asking the questions on this worksheet, you’re going to be in much better shape.

And let me be very clear:

Do not worry about doing this perfectly.

Don’t worry if you forget.

Don’t worry if you miss a day.

Don’t worry if you only complete part of it.

Just do your best.

We’re trying to build a habit—not perfection.

If you mess up, simply return to it.

The goal is a better habit, not a perfect one.

Right now, the habits you’re using aren’t producing the results you want.

You need habits that move you toward the future you want.

And there’s only one reason I want you to build these habits:

I want you to create an amazing future.

I want you to have a life where you can pursue your dreams.

I’m not saying that to sound cheesy or motivational.

I’m being completely serious.

Good habits create opportunities.

Good habits help you move toward your goals.

I don’t want you to settle for a mediocre future.

I don’t want you to settle for an average life.

I want you to have a remarkable future.

And you can—but you need better habits.

What I want you to do is use this worksheet every day from now until the end of the school year.

I actually created three different versions of it:

• A larger version that explains everything in detail.

• A medium-sized version that’s easier to read quickly.

• A micro version that you can cut out and carry with you.

There are several small copies on the page, so you can tape them to your desk, put them in your planner, stick them on your bedroom door, put them on the refrigerator, or place them anywhere you’ll see them regularly.

These worksheets contain what I call the magical key questions.

I put them together because they’re the exact questions I use with my students every day.

If you follow these questions consistently, you can feel confident that you’re covering all the important bases.

Parents, this is important for you too.

Once you’ve gone through these questions with your child, you need to let the conversation end for the evening.

A lot of students feel overwhelmed and stressed when conversations about school turn into endless lectures.

I’m not trying to make parents feel guilty.

I’m just telling you what I see every day.

Many students already feel a tremendous amount of pressure.

Parents are usually asking questions because they care and want to help, but sometimes it feels to the student like the conversation never ends.

That can be incredibly stressful.

So once you’ve gone through these questions, trust the process and let it go for the night.

You’re looking for small steps of progress.

Small improvements count.

If you’re a student, I want you to go through these questions every night.

You can do it with a parent.

You can do it with an accountability partner.

Or you can do it by yourself.

The important thing is that you do it consistently.

If you work through these questions every day, you’ll be covering the areas that matter most.

Here’s what I wrote:

“Do you want to turn things around in school? Then use these questions on a daily basis until they become part of your thinking.”

If you do this for the next couple of months, these questions will become more natural.

You won’t have to think so hard about them.

They’ll start becoming automatic.

I also wrote:

“These are the types of key questions every successful student learns to ask.”

If you look at students who consistently do well in school, you’ll notice something.

They naturally ask themselves these questions.

If you’re struggling in school, you probably don’t ask yourself these questions very often.

And that’s okay.

That’s exactly why I’m teaching them to you.

Let’s begin.

1. Plan

When you get home from school, one of the best things you can do is spend five minutes planning your evening.

I don’t care whether you start homework immediately afterward.

What matters is that you pause and make a plan.

Most struggling students don’t plan.

They come home, pull out a random assignment, and start working—or they avoid work entirely because everything feels overwhelming.

They know they have a lot to do, but they don’t have a clear strategy.

You need a plan.

Whether you enjoy planning or not doesn’t matter.

You need to build the habit.

Personally, I have my students write their plans on a small piece of paper.

Nothing fancy.

Just write down the three to five most important things you need to accomplish that evening.

2. NOP — Number One Priority

Next, ask yourself:

What is my Number One Priority tonight?

If you could only accomplish one thing this evening, what would it be?

What assignment matters most?

What project needs attention?

What test should you study for?

What task is the most important thing you could complete tonight?

That’s your NOP—your Number One Priority.

Ideally, you should complete your NOP before anything else.

Get it done first.

Sometimes that’s not realistic, but whenever possible, tackle your most important task before moving on to less important work.

3. Planner

Now, earlier we talked about planning your evening.

This section is different.

Your nightly plan is simply a short list of tonight’s tasks.

Your planner is where you keep track of everything coming up.

You need to update your planner mindfully.

Ask yourself:

Do I have assignments in:

• Math?

• Science?

• Social Studies?

• Language Arts?

• Any other classes?

Then ask yourself:

Should I be reading anything?

Should I be writing anything?

Do I have projects I should be working on?

Should I be studying for any upcoming tests or quizzes?

Let me explain why this matters.

Many of my students are professional procrastinators.

Honestly, I’ve struggled with procrastination myself throughout my life.

A student might have three weeks to read a novel, but because it isn’t due tomorrow, it never makes it into the planner.

Then suddenly the deadline arrives.

The same thing happens with research papers, long-term projects, presentations, and test preparation.

You need to think beyond tomorrow.

Ask yourself:

• Am I supposed to be reading something?

• Do I have a writing assignment I should be making progress on?

• Is there a project that deserves attention right now?

• Should I already be studying for a test that’s next week?

Successful students don’t wait until the night before.

They work steadily over time.

That’s why these items belong in your planner.

4. Check Your Grades

Next, I want you to check your grades.

But I don’t want you to simply look at the overall grade.

I don’t care as much whether you have a B, a C, or an A in the class.

What I care about are the details.

Look carefully for:

• Missing assignments

• Incomplete assignments

• Zeros

• Late work

• Anything that still needs attention

Those are the things that matter.

Ask yourself:

What action items need to be addressed?

Make a list of the assignments, projects, or tasks that require action.

That’s what you’re looking for when you check your grades.

I also want to say something important.

Be honest and forthcoming with your parents.

Please don’t lie about your grades.

Now, if your parents are constantly asking about grades and it’s becoming overwhelming, you have the right to set healthy boundaries.

You can say:

“Mom, Dad, I don’t want to talk about grades every single day.”

Maybe you agree to discuss grades once or twice a week instead.

That’s reasonable.

However, if you’re getting D’s and F’s, your parents absolutely have the right to be involved.

They have the right to ask questions and help you figure things out.

As the end of the school year approaches, that becomes even more important.

So be honest.

Don’t hide things.

Don’t lie.

Being honest is always easier than carrying around the stress of keeping secrets.

5. Advocacy

The next question is:

Do I need to email my teachers or go to office hours?

This is called advocacy.

Here’s what happens all the time.

I’ll say to one of my students:

“Why don’t we email your teacher right now about this missing assignment?”

And they’ll say:

“Oh, I’ll talk to them tomorrow.”

Then tomorrow comes, and they forget.

The opportunity is lost.

So stop resisting.

If you trust me, then for the next couple of months, whenever you have missing assignments, zeros, or questions about your grades, email your teacher or attend office hours.

Be proactive.

Don’t wait.

Don’t cut corners.

It’s the end of the school year.

You need to advocate for yourself.

Remember:

This is for you.

Your teachers can’t help if they don’t know what’s going on.

6. Backpack

Next:

Reorganize your backpack every night.

This only takes a minute if you do it consistently.

For the rest of the school year, I want you to go through your backpack every evening.

Now, yes, if you have rotting food in there, throw it away.

But honestly, that’s not what worries me most.

What really hurts students are loose papers.

My students constantly lose assignments because papers get shoved into the bottom of the backpack and disappear into the abyss.

Those stray papers become missing assignments.

Missing assignments become zeros.

Zeros become failing grades.

So every day, clean out your backpack.

At a minimum:

• Remove loose papers.

• Put papers where they belong.

• Throw away trash.

• Organize materials.

It only takes a few minutes, but it can save you a lot of stress.

7. Focus

Next, ask yourself:

How is my focus tonight?

Focus has two parts.

The first part is trying to focus.

The second part is removing distractions.

A lot of students focus on the first part and ignore the second.

If your phone is sitting next to you, that’s a problem.

If Snapchat is open, that’s a problem.

If you’re checking social media every few minutes, that’s a problem.

If you have twenty browser tabs open, that’s a problem.

If Minecraft is running in the background, that’s a problem.

You need to remove distractions.

Turn off your phone.

Put it in another room.

Close unnecessary tabs.

Remove anything that’s competing for your attention.

Maybe that means closing your bedroom door.

Maybe it means asking your little brother or sister not to interrupt you.

Maybe it means moving to a quieter location.

Whatever your distractions are, identify them and eliminate them.

Don’t fool yourself.

Value yourself enough to create an environment where you can actually focus and succeed.

You’re worth that effort.

8. Temperature Check

The final question is what I call a temperature check.

Every day, ask yourself:

What is my biggest stress right now?

Then ask:

What is the solution to that stress?

Take a moment to really think about it.

Too many people spend their lives reacting to stress instead of responding to it.

When something stressful happens, they panic.

They avoid it.

They procrastinate.

They shut down.

But you want to learn how to slow down and respond thoughtfully.

You want to be intentional.

You want to ask yourself:

“What is actually causing this stress?”

And then:

“What can I do about it?”

Sometimes the solution is sending an email.

Sometimes it’s having a conversation.

Sometimes it’s apologizing.

Sometimes it’s completing an assignment you’ve been avoiding.

Whatever it is, identify both the stress and the next step.

That’s how you move forward.

I created several versions of this worksheet for both students and parents.

The smaller versions contain the same questions in a very simple format.

You can keep them on your desk, in your planner, on your wall, or anywhere you’ll see them regularly.

Then, every evening, you can quickly go through the list.

It might take five minutes.

It might take ten.

It might take fifteen.

But if you consistently ask yourself these questions, your grades can improve dramatically.

And remember:

You do not need to do this perfectly.

If you miss a day, that’s okay.

If you forget a question, that’s okay.

If you only complete part of the list, that’s okay.

If you make a mistake, that’s okay.

Just come back to it.

For example, maybe you weren’t honest about your grades one day and now you feel guilty about it.

Well, ask yourself:

“What is the stress?”

Maybe the stress is that you weren’t honest.

Then ask:

“What is the solution?”

Maybe the solution is apologizing and telling the truth.

The point isn’t perfection.

The point is progress.

If you consistently implement these questions during the final months of the school year, something important happens.

Instead of things predictably falling apart, they start holding together.

The end of the school year becomes smoother.

Less stressful.

More manageable.

And a lot more enjoyable.

Why does that matter?

For two reasons.

First, it helps create opportunities for an incredible future.

Good habits today create opportunities tomorrow.

Second, it gives you the chance to enjoy your summer.

No summer school.

No repeating classes.

No worrying about making up credits.

No spending your vacation thinking about unfinished schoolwork.

Instead, you can actually relax.

You can enjoy your freedom.

You can enjoy your summer the way you deserve to.

So remember:

• Make a plan.

• Identify your Number One Priority.

• Update your planner.

• Check your grades.

• Advocate for yourself.

• Organize your backpack.

• Improve your focus.

• Check in with your stress.

Do those things consistently.

Not perfectly.

Consistently.

And you’ll be amazed by the difference they can make.

All right, with that, I hope you have an amazing day.

I’ll see you soon.

Take care.