Questions to Ask Students About Homework and School Responsibilities

Hey parents and teachers,

Today I want to explain some of the questions I use with my students when I’m helping them stay on top of their schoolwork.

My name is Seth Perler. I’m an executive function coach, and after years of working with students who struggle with executive function—students with missing assignments, incomplete work, late submissions, failing grades, and declining academic performance—I’ve developed a set of questions that consistently help uncover what’s really going on.

Many parents have conversations like this:

Parent: “Do you have any homework?”

Student: “No.”

Or:

Parent: “How’s school going?”

Student: “Fine.”

The problem is that students often either:

• Aren’t fully aware of everything they need to do.

• Can’t recall it in the moment.

• Don’t want to discuss it.

• Feel resistant and want to be left alone.

As a result, parents don’t get meaningful information about what’s actually happening.

Over time, I realized that there are certain questions that consistently lead to better conversations and more accurate answers.

Before You Begin: Check In Emotionally

Before jumping into academic questions, it’s important to stay attuned to your child’s emotional state.

Sometimes the real issue isn’t homework at all. They might be:

• Exhausted

• Overwhelmed

• Stressed

• Not sleeping enough

• Eating poorly

• Feeling emotionally drained

I often start with a simple temperature check:

“How are you doing today on a scale from 1 to 10?”

This gives valuable insight into where they’re at emotionally before discussing schoolwork.

Question #1: What Is Your Number-One Priority?

This is one of the most powerful questions I ask.

I might say:

“What’s the number-one most important thing you need to do today that, if you completed it, you’d feel good about your day?”

Students might answer:

• “I need to finish my math assignment.”

• “I need to write part of my essay.”

• “I need to update my planner.”

• “I need to organize my backpack.”

The answer isn’t always academic. What’s important is helping the student identify their highest-priority task.

I often give them extra wait time after asking. Silence allows them to think more deeply.

Question #2: Do You Have Work for Any of Your Classes?

Even if a student says they don’t have homework, I still ask about individual classes.

For example:

• Math?

• Science?

• English?

• History?

• Social Studies?

• Foreign Language?

• Any electives?

Sometimes students need extra prompts before they remember assignments.

Ideally, they would check their planner or online portal while answering, but we’re often working with students who are still developing those executive-function skills.

Question #3: Do You Have Any Make-Up Work?

This is another important question.

Students tend to focus on today’s assignments and forget older unfinished work.

Ask:

“Do you have any missing or make-up work?”

This often brings forgotten assignments back onto their radar.

Question #4: Do You Have Any Long-Term Assignments?

Students frequently overlook larger projects because they’re not due immediately.

I use the acronym PEPR:

P — Papers

Essays, research papers, writing assignments.

E — Exams

Tests, quizzes, assessments they should be studying for.

P — Projects

Presentations, group projects, creative assignments.

R — Readings

Books, novels, textbook chapters, or lengthy reading assignments.

Ask:

“Do you have any papers, exams, projects, or readings you should be working on?”

This helps students avoid last-minute panic when major assignments suddenly become urgent.

Question #5: Do You Need to Do Any Organizational Tasks?

Many students need to work on executive-function tasks that aren’t traditional homework.

Examples include:

• Organizing a backpack

• Filing papers

• Updating a planner

• Checking an online portal

• Reviewing email

• Cleaning up digital files

These tasks often have a significant impact on academic success.

Question #6: What Are You Forgetting?

This is the second most powerful question on the list.

After discussing everything else, ask:

“What are you forgetting?”

Then wait.

Many students pause and suddenly remember something important.

It’s remarkable how often this simple question reveals an assignment, responsibility, or task that hadn’t come up earlier.

Important: Don’t Overdo It

A common mistake is asking every question every night.

That can feel:

• Suffocating

• Micromanaging

• Overwhelming

And it may push students away rather than help them.

The goal is to connect with your child, not interrogate them.

Stay attuned to their emotional state and choose the questions that are most relevant.

A Simple Weekly Checklist

When reviewing responsibilities with your child, consider these five categories:

1. What’s your number-one priority?

2. Do you have homework for any classes?

3. Do you have any long-term assignments?

4. Do you have any organizational tasks to complete?

5. What are you forgetting?

You don’t need to go through the entire list every day.

Instead, consider doing a thorough review:

• Once a week, or

• Once every two weeks

As your child becomes more independent, they’ll begin asking themselves these questions automatically.

And that’s the ultimate goal: helping them develop the executive-function skills needed to manage their responsibilities on their own.

Take care, and I hope you have a great school year and a strong connection with your child.