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I have always had executive functioning struggles, and they caught up with me when I attempted to go to college. I was not ready, but I didn’t know that. I wanted the benefits of college without having to do the work, I thought I could somehow take the quick elevator to success. This video tells my ADHD and executive function college story. I hope you find it insightful and that it helps you get some great ideas and clarity because failing college is not fun.
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What’s up students? My name is Seth. What’s up? Brother, man, executive function coach and I have a struggling student navigate this thing called school. And in this video I’m talking to students are going into college or Hoover in college. I’m going to tell you three reasons. I failed out of college. And I’m telling you this because I do not want you to fail out of college. I want you to do what’s right for you and have a fantastic life and failing out of college is not a necessary step in life. First thing I want to tell you is that when I work with college students most of the college students that I work with are sophomores or second-year college students. Why do you think that is? Because I failed the first year or they more or less failed the first year so they didn’t make it to be a sophomore and they are a second-year freshman or they are a sophomore and they barely got to be a sophomore and they struggled a lot and they’re finally ready for help. I think Rob has a very hard thing to do. So anyhow. Why did I fail out of college? So I failed out of college went to Ball State University and I failed so I went to summer school on probation to start cuz I almost got out of high school. I didn’t feel like I had skated by. And then I had to go and I wanted to go to college really cuz I want to get away from my parents and I went to college on probation in summer school. So I didn’t even have a summer break after my senior year of high school. I didn’t even have summer break went straight to college on probation. I had to take three probationary classes. When I was in trouble, I often did well, so I was in trouble cuz I had to I was on probation to start college. So I did well, I got an A in 2 C’s true story. One of the classes that I got an A in the class. I got an A in was a study skills class true story. I got an A in study skills. And to cease and now I could go and fall so I go fall semester failed. I go spring semester failed after spring semester is over get a letter in the mail that says Seth do not come back you failed at about the university. Thanks for your money. Good luck. So I went to another college and I dropped out before I filled out that college was on quarters when fall quarter winter quarter didn’t go spring quarter cuz I dropped out cuz I had failed those two quarters before. How do I do it here are the three steps of how I did it? Number one? I didn’t go for me. I went because I was told all my life. I was supposed to go to college. I didn’t know there were other Alternatives. I just thought that’s what you do. There’s no buying or ownership that I wanted to go for me to learn to get an education to better myself to develop who I was to get exposed to lots of new educational ideas to get exposed to lots of new people and new ways of looking at the world. Have a great experience to build a career. I didn’t have any of that. I went because I thought that’s what you were supposed to do and I didn’t want to live at home anymore. I wanted to move out of my house and be independent and be on my own even though I was not Capable of being in pain. I did not have a date function skills necessary to be an adulterer to be on the owner to be independent, but I thought I did and I want to get away from my parents. They were bugging me or at least that’s how I perceived it. I regret the way that I was very hard on my parents and I have a fantastic relationship with them now, but I was not the easiest child number one way that I failed out of college is by not going for myself not going because I really wanted to go for good reasons. number two The way that I failed out of college was by not having the executive function skills. Navigate College I was emotionally dysregulated meeting. I was depressed. I was anxious I was uncomfortable. I was uncomfortable with who I was I was not confident in who I was I lived with a lot of fear that I wasn’t good enough in multiple ways. So I didn’t have the executive function what’s called emotional regulation like ways to work with my own fears and emotions and discomfort and stuff like that. I part of my dysregulation had to do what I was eating horrible food. I was not eating food that was nourishing my body. Has on a diet of processed foods Doritos pop and whatever. I was not sleeping. Well, I was up late. I was up all night. I was just I was it was just horrible sleep. I didn’t prioritize myself. Well, I didn’t ask her size hardly. I I mean I never did like real exercise at that time. So and I didn’t have just other executive function skills, like planning and organizing and knowing how to study and knowing how to prioritize and knowing how to do all of these except blank. Something’s the third thing. So number one was I didn’t go for myself went for my parents cuz I thought it was supposed to number two was I didn’t have the exact function skills. I needed number three was I didn’t know how to ask for help. May think about sounds silly. Let me tell you it’s one of those important things I’ve ever learned my entire life. Is that a scrap? I didn’t know how to ask my teachers for help did not ask my parents for help to know how that’s two different help to know how does coaches for out to know I’d ask other students for help. Didn’t know how to ask anybody for help. I did not have humility. I had such a big ego. I could not show you that I had any weaknesses therefore I could never ask you for help and admit that I didn’t have to figure it out. So I thought that that would mean that there is something wrong with me. I thought that that would mean if I ask for help that I’m admitting that I’m broken and that I don’t want you to see that that was terrified me. so there is a quote by Zig Ziglar. There is no elevator to success. You got to climb the stairs, and I wanted the elevator to success. I want to go up. I want a quick fix one everything to be easy. I did not want to climb the stairs to success. I didn’t want to put in the work. I didn’t want to ask for help. I didn’t want to build the executive function skills. And I wasn’t doing it for me so that my friends is how I feel at a college. I hope you high schoolers or college students. Don’t ever go through what I went through. Colleges of right for everyone and it’s not right for everyone at the time when Society expects it to be right for you you got to do what’s right for you when it’s right for you when you have the school’s when you have the motivation when you have the buying when you have the ownership, you have to know how to ask for help and know that there’s nothing wrong with you. In fact asking for help is a sign of maturity is what real adults do it’s what we all need to do. We all need help Nobody Does it alone? No successful people no successful people. Do it alone. We all need each other. So my name is up stuff for what I, executive function coach in, Colorado. I hope you have a fantastic day. I hope you have a fantastic life and I hope this video help you if it did go ahead and give it a thumbs up or comment or like or share with somebody or something like that. I’ll see you in the next time. Take care.