How to Advocate for Executive Function, ADHD, with Sarah Kesty

I hope—alright, I guess I am. Hi everybody, what’s up? My name is Seth Perler, and this is Sarah Kesty. We are two people in the executive function world trying to help families and support students who struggle with executive function, ADHD, autism, aspects of dyslexia, and other challenges.

Sarah and I are both doing our own work in the world, and we became friends while trying to serve these families and kids. So—hi, Sarah.

“Hey! That was a good description.”
“Thanks, I made it up.”
“Well, you wing it well.”
“Well, dude, it really is true. That’s kind of our life purpose. We’re both coaches, and here we are—building each other’s businesses and trying to help everybody.”

What Sarah and I are going to talk to you about today—mainly for parents, but also for teachers and therapists—is advocacy. We decided to create a short video series (we’ll see how many parts it becomes) about advocacy—how you can advocate for your child or student, help them get their needs met, and understand what works and what doesn’t.

So Sarah, what’s on the agenda for today? What are people going to learn?

“We’re going to talk about the power of accommodations—what actually works and how it can transform a school experience for a kid with executive function needs.”

What is an accommodation? Actually, let’s start with advocacy. I’ll define that, and you can define accommodation.

Advocacy means that your child—whether or not they have a diagnosis, an IEP, a 504 plan, or any formal documentation—has a need that you recognize. You believe they need support, and you want to communicate that need to the school so it can be better met. That way, your child is better supported and gets more out of their education.

“Absolutely. It starts with awareness—understanding your child’s needs—and then identifying small changes that can improve their academic experience. Those changes are called accommodations.”

So, give us a definition of accommodation.

“I don’t usually use that word—it’s kind of legal language. You’ll notice terms like 504, IEP, RTI, MTSS—there’s a lot of alphabet soup in education. But the key point is: you don’t actually need official documentation to advocate.

When you *do* have official plans, that’s where accommodations come in. Accommodations are small changes in how a student receives or demonstrates learning. These changes can have a big impact because they address specific executive function needs.”

Excellent. So we’re accommodating a need. Let’s make that concrete.

If I were teaching a very young child guitar, I might use a smaller guitar—that’s an accommodation. It simply makes the task more accessible.

Now, we’re talking about accommodations in the classroom. Sarah is a teacher, and I was a teacher for 12 years, and now we both work with families. So we understand this from multiple perspectives.

Let’s talk about the power of accommodations. I want to start with a story, because our brains learn through narratives—especially teenagers.

I’ll call this student Dylan. Dylan had significant behavioral issues in class. He would leave without permission, become irritable, and act disrespectfully toward teachers. But when we looked deeper, we discovered something important.

He needed a way to self-advocate—to speak up—but he also had unmet academic needs that were showing up as behavior. It was almost self-preservation: “I’d rather look like I don’t care than admit I don’t understand.”

This is a high school student. Vulnerability at that age is socially risky. It takes courage and self-awareness that many teens are still developing.

His parent was understandably overwhelmed—“My kid is a great person. What’s going on?” They knew he had ADHD, so we started looking deeper.

When we analyzed his patterns, we saw that when he became confused in class, within five to ten minutes, he would shut down or act out. Once he recognized that, he realized: “Maybe I need a situation where I’m not so lost.”

We leaned into his IEP and made adjustments—co-teaching environments, plus simple accommodations like allowing him to take a picture of the board so he didn’t have to remember everything.

The result? He started getting A’s and B’s. He stopped leaving class. He became socially engaged, went to the gym, did community service—he was happier and more fulfilled.

His needs were met through self-awareness and collective advocacy.

—

To wrap that up, one of the biggest issues is misunderstanding. When behavior is misinterpreted as laziness or defiance, we respond incorrectly. But when we understand the underlying need, we can support effectively.

So what do you do if your child has needs?

Start by stepping back and taking a “detective perspective.” Look at behaviors and ask: what skill might be missing? Then match that need with an accommodation.

Take note-taking as an example. It requires working memory, attention, processing, prioritization, and more. That’s a heavy cognitive load.

So accommodations might include:

* Teacher-provided notes
* Permission to take photos
* Peer note-sharing

These don’t replace learning—they support it. They act as scaffolding while skills develop.

Some parents worry: “Will my child become dependent?” No—this is about support, not avoidance. It’s like learning to swim with floaties before swimming independently.

—

Scaffolding is key.

A good teacher meets a student where they are and helps them grow step by step. But in large classrooms with limited resources, this isn’t always easy.

So as a parent, ask:
Where is my child now?
What’s the next step forward?

Also, remember—some students simply cannot process information and take notes simultaneously. It’s like rubbing your stomach and patting your head—times ten.

If we misunderstand that and assume lack of effort, we miss the opportunity to help.

—

Two important tips:

First, don’t rely on the school to generate all ideas. Come prepared with a list of needs and possible accommodations.

Second, be careful with wording. Avoid accommodations that depend on the student requesting help. If they had that skill already, they wouldn’t need the accommodation.

Advocacy should be a shared responsibility.

—

To wrap up, teachers are human. They’re overwhelmed, especially later in the school year. Kind reminders and collaboration go a long way.

—

Alright everybody, I’m Seth Perler from sethperler.com and executivefunctionsummit.com—and this is Sarah Kesty.

“Find me at sarahkesty.com and iepomg.com. I also have podcasts on IEPs and executive function.”

Thanks for being here. Go connect with your child. Take care.