He’s 13, in 8th grade. He loses most worksheets, project rubrics, classwork, etc!
He has a binder with sections for each class, some things make it in, and many others don’t. When they do make it home, I make copies of important stuff that he needs for fear of them being lost. He doesn’t know where the lost things go, help!
He is missing an important worksheet due tomorrow and words/definitions they did in class that he needs to study for a test.
How do we prevent him from losing so many papers? What systems work/don’t work for you? Is this something I should be punishing him for or no? It’s so frustrating!!
Love my work and want to give? Click here!
To support me, please CLICK at the bottom to share. Click here to visit my official YouTube Channel & subscribe if you want! Thank you — Seth
Reading the transcript? Great! We’re currently uploading hundreds of transcripts so you can read them asap, but they are NOT all edited yet. This is a big process. If you notice anything wrong and want to help us, feel free to click this Google Form to share it. Thanks so much for pitching in! – Seth
Everybody what’s up, this is Dad. For that, I hope you’re having a great start to the school year. I have an awesome question from a Christie. She says her son is 13. He’s in eighth grade. He loses most worksheets project rubrics class work, etc. He has a binder with sections for each class something to make it in and many others don’t when they do make it home. I make copies of the important stuff. I need for fear of them being lost. He doesn’t know where the lost things go help his missing an important worksheet due tomorrow and words definition. They did in class that he needs to study for a test. How do we prevent him from moving losing so many papers? What systems work or don’t work for you. Is this something that I should be punishing him for now? It’s so frustrating. I hear your frustration. This is a really difficult and complicated issue and there’s a lot of aspects to it. I’ll try to cover some of that and hopefully give you some guidance and solutions that might work for you. So he’s 13th and he’s in eighth grade. Obviously next year in 9th grade things are going to get even more intense. So taking this very seriously this year is really important and one of the things I want to mention about that cuz you’re not going to be able to make copies forever. You’re going to get even more more papers next year. So one of the things that I want to mention about getting this done this year is doing the weekly overhaul sounds like you’re very involved and that’s awesome in the Wii with the weekly overhaul in my blog I send out as one of the one of these in my mini course, I just resent it out everybody actually, but on the weekly overhaul at what I recommend it if Sunday night’s work for you. Is that every Sunday night you go over all the systems in and Sort of to reset like you would do on your telephone, but you’re doing a reset of the folders in the planter and everything. And on that reset night on that Sunday night or whatever time you choose to do that with your child. You you go over everything you go through everything with a fine-tooth comb. So when I’m working with clients, I’m doing this at least on a weekly basis. I’m going through every single pocket in the backpack. I have them bring everything home from school. I don’t want anything in the locker in the school desk. What at whichever one they have depending on what age they are and what the school is like, I want everything with us so that we can go through everything with a fine-tooth comb because they do not have they don’t track details while so they need to be supported Matt, especially if they’re going to get a ding by the school for not having stuff. I really need to make sure they have it but you also want to teach them to have that system. So anyhow part of what I would do this whole eighth grade year is do a Sunday overall and but it I like you’re already doing a lot of that but that’s something I would keep doing the entire school year you want to do is call gradual release of responsibility, which means that week by week month by month. You’re getting your child to take more responsibility of the process of getting organized. Of course, your child needs to spend a lot of time just doing the homework and studying right now. I’m probably doing makeup work, unfortunately, but as the year goes on you want them to take more of the responsibility of getting it organized? So he has a binder with sections for each class. Something’s make it in in many other things don’t if he if he’s not required to use binders by the school. I don’t like binders that all I like simple folders not for a kid like that who is is loses tons of stuff. I would probably just go with literally the folding folders that don’t even have pockets one color for each class or blue one red one green one. Yellow one orange one, whatever. And I would probably give them a zip binder that it can those can go in and at this point I would just want my child to get it in that thing or if it’s in the back those Boulders in the backpack. Just get the papers in the backpack. I’m not so concerned about the folders when they get home. You can help them reorganize the folders everyday for a while. If you can do that. I mean this kid, oh really is starting Ground Zero. They really need to really be starting from of a place assuming that they really don’t know how to do this in and build from there. So simple simple simple system. I would not use a binder. It’s just too tedious for your child to use So I would Nick the binder and get some simple folders. You could do the pocket folders either one is fine. But simple folders and I would I would for this kiddo. I would use the q q u e u e if you look at my blog and look up the word q in the blog Surge and watch the video about the Q and 2 Q is just sort of a catch-all place because if I was working with your kid, I would tell them luck either get the papers in the right folder or at the very least Jam them into the Q and we’ll deal with them after school. So at least if they get all if they’re not putting the wrong papers in the if they’re not putting the wrong papers in the wrong folders or papers from the wrong class into a folder. That’s not for that class. At least if it’s Tray in the backpack or it’s in the queue you can reorganize it. So I’d probably start with that. I also talked a lot about minimalism. I would not keep stuff that does not need to be kept after making copies. That’s one thing and I would have an archived. I talked a lot about an archive, but I would not keep anything that does not need to be kept I would trash it if if you know, I don’t know if it’s completed work and it’s been graded in the teachers put in the Gradebook done get rid of it. If you’re afraid they’ll needed to study for a test 99% of the time they don’t because the teacher will give a study guide. So that’s the big misconception a lot of times if they really do that’s one issue. But mostly I want them to have 5 to 10 papers in any given folder at any given time. I wanted to be pretty current work. I don’t want them to have a bunch of old stuff in there. So I would help with that. He said he doesn’t know where the lost things go. He probably really doesn’t know where they go. He’s missing an important worksheet do tomorrow. I would be advocating for him emailing the teacher. I would a lot of teachers will put this stuff online so that you can get it. So I’ve been scouring the teacher’s websites. I be emailing them. Like I wouldn’t you email them long emails. I’d email short bullet emails. We need support we need help my kids starting with executive function, please support us. Can you please help us with copies our kid just lose them. I get every year I get it a kid or two who I start working with them and I start going through the backpack and I start pulling everything out and I noticed that there’s like they’re there are some papers were there’s like three copies of the exact same thing and none of them are done and I say why do you have three copies of this and they say all will I lost one? So I asked the teacher for another one then ask for another one. So that’s the Heath kids that’s the ghetto you have. And so those teacher that are making all those copies. They’re really nice to do that. But if they can email it to you, that’s a lot easier if they if you’re talkin take a picture of it or the teacher can take a picture of it. That’s a lot easier also and if the teacher already keeps it online on their site, that’s the best because then everything gets covered and that there is no problem. So how do we prevent him from losing so many papers? I would say use the Q do daily overhaul for now for probably the first 8 weeks of school. I would do a daily overall with or without him. I’d reorganize sometimes I would do it with him. But sometimes I would just do it for him. He does not have the skill. It’s not going to magically appear. So as far as punishing him the word punishment, I wouldn’t punish him because it’s not going to change the behavior. Is it a can’t or won’t it? Sounds like he he can’t he does not have the executive function skills to do what he is being asked to do. So punishing him is not going to change that behavior now consequences. There’s a time and a place for the concept for a natural appropriate consequence that’s going to make a connection between what’s going on here and my Titan is awareness and change the behavior. So try You know, I had a mom recently saying that she threatened to go into her middle schools School in the classroom to deal with it in front of everybody hates to get stuff if if he didn’t do certain things and you know, that’s an appropriate consequences. It’s like I said, she was so fed up. She’s going to go in there and regardless of how embarrassing it is form. She’s going to get what needs to be gotten and and that has affected this kid. Not that that’s going to work for everybody. But you have to really think is that is that an appropriate thing? You’re not doing it out of anger you’re drinking out of this frustration obviously, but not at anger towards your child to train it support your child. If you come at it from that frame and you like luck, I’m going to do this. If you don’t do the X Y and Z this needs to happen. It might help but it sounds like this could a really does need to build the system. So simple folder system is simple Q system really being on top of every day for a couple months. So I hope that helps a little bit and it’s a really complicated issue and I wish I could be Hands-On with the kiddos so that I could help you but that’s you know, I I just can’t but check out my course that course video on the Q and in that might help to. Okay. Good luck. Take care.