How Self-Care is DIFFERENT for kids vs adults

Parents, teachers, therapists—maybe some students—in this video, I’m going to talk to you about self-care.

But really, I want to focus on one area of confusion I see a lot: self-care looks different when we’re talking about students versus adults. I’ll explain that in a moment.

My name is Seth Perler. I’m an executive function coach, and I help struggling students navigate education so they can have a great life. You can find me at SethPerler.com, where I share a lot of resources and freebies to support students with executive function challenges, ADHD, and other difficulties that can impact quality of life.

Because ultimately, that’s what this is about—we want people to have a great education so they can have a great life.

Now, let’s talk about self-care.

“Self-care” is one of those terms that people use in many different ways. I want to simplify it based on something I’ve noticed that can be really helpful.

When people think about self-care, they often think in terms of adults. For adults, self-care might mean getting a good workout, going for a manicure or pedicure, seeing a doctor, or doing something relaxing or enjoyable. It’s very personal, and everyone defines it differently.

But when we’re talking about kids, I don’t want to complicate it.

When people talk about “self-care for kids,” what they’re usually referring to comes down to four main areas.

So what are those four things?

From an executive function perspective—how the brain executes tasks and functions in daily life—the foundation is sleep, nutrition, and exercise.

So first: sleep.

Is the child getting enough sleep? And not just sleep, but restful sleep—waking up actually feeling rested?

The brain does not function well without proper sleep. So self-care here means creating the conditions for consistent, restorative sleep.

Second: nutrition.

What is the child eating? Is the food actually nourishing?

That’s the key question. With so many processed foods and chemicals in modern diets, we have to ask: is this supporting the brain, or working against it?

Third: exercise.

Call it movement, fitness—whatever you want. The brain works best when the body is active. Regular movement is essential for healthy brain function.

So those are the first three: sleep, nutrition, and exercise.

Now, what’s the fourth?

The fourth is what I call “other.”

This includes everything else related to basic self-care habits and well-being. For example: brushing teeth, showering regularly, general hygiene, and even mental health concerns.

Sometimes this category includes more serious issues, like self-harm or emotional struggles.

So when I ask, “How’s the self-care?” what I’m really looking at is:

How’s the sleep?
How’s the nutrition?
How’s the movement?
And what’s going on in the “other” category?

There are some very common patterns that show up here—things like kids resisting basic hygiene, especially brushing teeth. I hear that one all the time.

So again, for kids, self-care is really about these core areas: sleep, nutrition, exercise, and other essential habits.

Now, I want to ask you something.

What do you think is the difference between self-care for adults and self-care for kids?

I’m asking this in a practical way—what’s actually useful?

Did I leave anything out? How would you define self-care for adults versus kids, especially when we’re trying to support a child who is struggling?

What are your thoughts?

Again, my name is Seth Perler. Head over to SethPerler.com or ExecutiveFunctionSummit.com to check out my work. I’ve got a lot of resources and freebies there.

If my work is helping you, please share it, give it a thumbs up, and subscribe. I really appreciate your support.

Have a fantastic day. I wish you peace of mind, joy, and connection with the people you care about.

Take care.